I'm Monalisa. Most of the time, I write when i'm feeling nostalgic. I also like to write out my hopes, dreams, and desires. God First, Bro. You may know me as @themonalisasmiles.
This song brought a smile to my face.
(Source: asteezzy, via charlesnavarro)
I feel so stupid right now. How can I let myself fall for my own mind tricks? All this time, I’ve been in love of the idea of my own fairy tale. It took me this long to realize it. Maybe all of this isn’t what I think it is. Maybe all of this was just a coincidence. Maybe God has someone else for me. It honestly makes me feel like a piece of shit. I feel like I’ve wasted two years crushing on someone I don’t even know. I’m just so done with dealing with anything that has to do with boys, love, and fairy tales. Fuck love.
We’re never gonna get back together, so please stop trying. We are a done deal, we had our time.
they say that words have the power to save or take a life.
every day, thousands of teenagers will take their own lives due to bullying or depression. YOU can make a difference to this horrible statistic.
what you have to do:
- reblog this and go to your dashboard
- send an anonymous message saying ‘you’re beautiful.’ to any person who comes up on your dash.
you have no idea how much of a difference you might make. x
(via kayy-laaa)
We met for a reason. I just know it.
Through my eyes, I was looking for a fairytale to call my own. I wanted what was in disney movies. I wanted to be a princess who finds her price charming. I wanted to tell my own fairytale that kids would find in storybooks. At this point, I don’t know what to feel. I have mixed emotions to what has happened today. I feel like I’ve finally successfully achieved my goal of talking to him. But on the other hand, I feel as if it wasn’t worth everything. I feel as if I’ve wasted two years dwelling on this guy I’ve never had a conversation with until today. To be honest, it was not what I’d hoped for. It wasn’t how I had dreamt it would be. I guess my mind was so fixated on finding a prince charming of my own that my heart decided to fall for someone I barely knew. It’s as if my mind longs to live reality as if it was a fairytale.
I have a tendancy to look in the past. To compare what used to be to what is now the present. Maybe that’s the reason why I can never enjoy myself. Because I spend too much time looking back, I waste time doing so rather than looking forward to the future.
My insecurities are stopping me.
Maybe if I was more confident in myself, maybe I would’ve taken a chance and just plunge ahead, ignoring all the negativity and all my fears just to say a simple ‘hello.’ It’s more difficult then it sounds, but not difficult enough to give up rather quickly like i am now. If only I didn’t have to think so negatively, but I only have my own mind to blame for thinking the worst of the situation. I’m just afraid. Of what exactly? Of what your thoughts are on my appearance. My insecurities are drowning me, and i’m unable to grasp for air.
There was just something interesting about today. I woke up feeling happy, and smiling. I was thankful for everything. Turns out, this day was absolutely imperfectly perfect. Conaidering God gave me a chance to meet him today, but I got scared. It’s not that i’m neccesarily scared of him. I’m just scared of what he’ll think of me. My insecurities really got to me before I got a chance to say a word. I chickened out and walked away. That was what made my day imperfect. In fact, i’m just glad that God listened to me and answered my prayers. I’m thankful for every chance He’s giving me. I just feel bad for not taking the chance. I’m sorry for myself for letting myself feel this way. But furthermore, the sunset was so pretty. I felt loved today. I felt happy. It was really different, but a good type of different. An interesting day, some that I need to have more of.
